I truly don't even know what day in this round we are....it seems like day 102 but I think it is 24. I also think it is Day 10 or 11 at zero. I wish I could say that today was better but unfortunately it was not. She continued to spike a fever all day yesterday and throughout the night. She takes the Tylenol, the fever breaks and then spikes right back up. She slept fairly well last night....Sophia was her nurse so that made her night much better. After we had to wake her around 10:00 pm to take Tylenol, she wanted to stay awake for a little bit to give Sophia a hug!!! Even thought she got another round of platelets yesterday, she still didn't get much of a bump because her fevers are eating all of the platelets. So....I am thinking she will get another transfusion tomorrow.
I left for 4 hours today to see Savannah, do laundry, and take a real shower. It was so good to see Savannah....she is so beautiful and such a good girl. Taylor was hysterical when I left but quickly fell back asleep. Sean stayed with her for a little bit until Papa came and then Papa stayed with her. Reality once again hit when I was home with Savannah. Savannah and I were enjoying time together watching TV when I realized it was almost time for me to get back to PCH. I told her I would be in my room getting ready and Daddy would be home soon. Sean walked into the bathroom carrying Savannah who was crying. When I asked Savannah what was wrong, she sobbed "Daddy's home, that means you are leaving again.!!!" It just never gets any easier.
Taylor slept most of the afternoon for Papa. Because Taylor's stomach "hurts" her so much, they ordered a Xray today to make sure everything looked ok. Luckily, the Xray was clean. They are pretty sure her stomach pain is due to sores in her throat and stomach. She had 3 doses of morphine today....seems like a lot. Tonight even after a dose of morphine she was still crying from the pain.....will see what the doctor thinks tomorrow. We might be heading toward a pain pump. Her blood cultures have grown back positive again so she will continue on the antibiotics.
All in all...another crappy day. Just watching Taylor be so miserable is absolutely excruciating....
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Kristen,
ReplyDeleteI'm Matt's mom in Chicago. I read your blog every day and can feel your pain. My heart goes out to Taylor, you and your family. I want you to know that I pray everyday for Taylor's recovery and for strength and hope for all of you. Taylor is also on our prayer list at church so many other people are praying for her. May God grant you a miracle.
Jackie Mueller
I open your blog everyday lately hoping to read about a change for the better. I am so sad to hear about all the physical pain Taylor is in, and all the emotional pain you and Savannah are in.
ReplyDeleteSimply put, 2009 has given your family enough to deal with. 2010 WILL bring the Souza's back together under one roof. Wishing you a New Year FILLED with HEALTH, HAPPINESS, and love!
Sending strength, love, and hugs!
Always,
Laurie T
We are so sorry to hear that Taylor has an infection. We hope that the antibiotics quickly help her get over this bug. Thinking of you all as we near 2010 and wishing you a happier and healthier new year. Sarah, Anthony, and Beckham
ReplyDeleteKristen 2010 is going to be a better year, it just has to be. My heart aches with each blog lately. I can't imagine what it feels like, I just keep praying and sending love and hugs to you guys. We love you, Kelly and Carly
ReplyDeleteKristen!
ReplyDeleteYou are a great mommy and I just want you to know that you and your fam are soo strong. 2010 has some great things coming for it.
That princess of yours is going to get through all of this then our poor little savannah will be able to do everything with her sister. You and Sean stay strong you can do it for yourself and Tay!
<3 Best Wishes!